Qualyn, Sunshine, Chris, and Rain Margain
24; vegan 5 years
3; vegan 3 years
31; vegan 5 years
8 months; vegan 8 months
Hometown Seattle, WA
Qualyn: We got the diagnosis that says what hyperemesis was, but the doctor that handled the first [pregnancy]⸺after Francis died, we learned it wasn’t handled properly⸺but the whole time, she was like, ‘Hyperemesis sucks, but it’s not threatening, it’s not a big deal.’ And later, you find out that hyperemesis is usually not a big deal, but my case is rare, and my extreme case is super rare. Every time I’m pregnant, I could die or my baby could die. And we didn’t understand how difficult and how different it was the first time…
The main focus in a capitalist society is money making. When it comes to career, people say, ‘Is there anything you’re willing to die for?’ You’re willing to put anything into achieving monetary goals. That never meant anything to me. The only thing I ever knew I wanted was children. And my family was the only thing I ever knew worth dying for. Knowing that I could die to have Sunshine, it isn’t as crazy for me as it might be for other people, because that was the only thing I ever wanted.
Chris: You have to be realistic. What are the alternatives? You could die, the baby could die, or the baby could live. Can you do this? Yes. Do we want to do this? Yes. Let’s equip ourselves to have the best chance of a positive outcome.
Qualyn: Especially when we know that the last doctor admitted negligence, and we know the things she did and the things that she should have done, it makes you feel more confident going into it another time. The only thing that wasn’t confident was I knew that I would end up feeling horrible and going through a lot. But if it’s handled properly, I’ll only feel horrible for 9 months. And I will go through a lot for 9 months, but in the end, Sunshine will be born and she’ll get what she deserves, which is parents that wanted and loved and fought for her. And we’ll get what we want, which is a healthy, wonderful person to cherish and love and teach to be a loving, compassionate person in what can sometimes be a very dark place.
photo by Holly Feral